Friday, October 30, 2009

Sick and Burnt Out

I am getting so burnt out on pictures. GASP!
It seems like it's all I ever do...except for sleep and moan about my throat pain.
Okay, so I like taking pictures, I like editing pictures, etc. But, since September it's all I've been doing. It's getting so monotonous. Maybe it's not the pictures that I'm getting tired of, but the quantity instead. Especially this week.
I've been sick (who knew?!). Wednesday I took some senior pictures because I was thinking that I was feeling good. Of course half way through it I started to feel not great again. I'm still working on pictures from last Saturday, though those are pretty close to being done. And, I have two photo shoots tomorrow. I'm sooo dreading tomorrow. For one, I just know that I'm going to not feel good tomorrow. And, for two, I have no idea how to pose people for family photos. I had a dream the other day that I was at that photo shoot and I had no idea what to do. Maybe Miles will come with me? I think I could use some help with that.

This is what I want:
1. To feel 100% better.
No more of this not hungry, everything sounds disgusting, horribly sore throat and headache thing. It's just getting annoying. I go to sleep freezing and wake up hot and sweating.
2. To be done with pictures for just one week.
I love the feeling I get when I finish editing the last picture from a shoot. Then I get to upload them on Facebook, get the CDs to the person, and be done. Ah! I want that feeling with every project I have coming up and currently taking place. I want to be able to just relax for a little bit and not feel like I'm wasting time.

That's it! Is that so much to ask for?! It seems there's no end in sight! (I do actually think that December will be much better...or at least I hope so).

In kind of other news. I had to open at work today. I was actually not dreading it because I only had to work til 12 and it's never too horrible.
Back story: I was supposed to work yesterday (7:45-3) but Miles called in for me (I like him) because I woke up with a fever the night before and he didn't want me to go to work...and I didn't want to go to work.
So, I get there today. All is well, I put money in the drawers, get everything in its place, etc. Then, I look at the daily schedule to see who my cashier will be. It's Kim, which is cool. But, the thing is that Kim wasn't coming in until 9. Okay, so no big deal, that first hour is usually so dead that we don't need more than one person. But, wait! There's more! Other than a manager (who, by the way, was Wanda who happened to leave at 8am aka opening time) the only other person there, on the floor, was Johnnie who was running Layaway, Sports, Electronics, everything on that side of the store. My jewelry, ladieswear, everything else people weren't coming in until 9. Okay, so first I just think, "Well, what if someone calls and wants to know if we have something? Crap." But, no that didn't happen! Instead someone wanted to see if we had the necklace/bracelet combo in the ad for Friday only. I hadn't worked in jewelry for months, and since I had been back there they've changed the locks and moved things around. So, I went over and searched for the necklace and bracelet, having no idea where they'd have it. After people started lining up at service, Sharon walked in and came to my rescue. She helped the lady in jewelry before clocking in.
Then, everything was fine. It wasn't busy, I had enough help, no one got completely angry. Then! I was talking to Kim about how I was getting off work at 12, while looking at the schedule. It said I was working til 3. Now wait, my schedule in the back said 12, Alma was coming in at 12, why am I here til 3? Who knows? I asked Steve if I was staying til 12 or 3 and he said, "You're staying til 3!" To which I replied, "Awwww, really?" in a very whiny tone.
Okay, so 12 comes around, and I don't feel horrible. Then 1 comes around. Yep, I'm feeling pretty horrible now. From about 12:30 to 3 I was miserable. Customers would ask if I was okay, or tired, and when I'm sick I can't talk to people I don't know about how I'm sick. I also can't get sympathy. Both of those things make me cry.

So, I stopped by my momma's house, dropped of my laundry, and came home. I slept for probably an hour and a half or something like that and I woke up sweating again.


Tuesday, October 27, 2009

What a day.

Sunday night my sinuses started hurting.
Monday my throat hurt, my back hurt, I was cold, I was hot, and my stomach didn't feel awesome.
Today I had to work from 7:45 to 3. I was convinced that I'd be fine and that I would feel better being active. Miles told me to call in, but I mean, I thought I was fine...and I really hate being an inconvenience for anyone.
So, I went it. I really didn't feel horrible for the first hour. Then it was all down hill from there. When I went to lunch I bought a thermometer and took my temperature. It was 99.7, no big deal. I was freezing. I think I spent most of the day crouched down in the corner behind the service desk with the heater pointed at me. But, then I'd get super hot. There were multiple times when I almost started crying, because really it's not hard to make me cry, especially when I'm sick. When I went to break I took my temperature again, and that time it was 101.0. I told Dana, my cashier, and she kept telling me how I needed to go home. I just really didn't want to ask if I could go. I had told Steve, the store manager, that I felt horrible, and Erin, an assistant manager, knew that I felt horrible. I just hoped that one of them would tell me to go home, but of course they didn't, darn the luck. Dana kept telling Steve that he needed to send me home.
Finally it was 3, after the longest day of work ever...EVER! I was feeling a little better so I stopped and got a taco so I could eat really quick when I got home then sleep.
As I was getting onto Frederick from I-29, I was rear ended. Apparently someone thought it was a good idea to just put a stop sign at that intersection. I started to pull up slowly so I could see better, but it was incredibly difficult to see when anyone was actually going to be going. Then, a dude named Dana in a black truck, I believe it was a GMC hit me. I just started crying. Not really because I got hit, but because it had been an atrocious day and all I wanted to do was go home...and I was so close! He got out of the truck and we popped the trunk to make sure it worked, which it does. Both of our license plates are dented. But, the left brake light is loose, and the trunk no longer lines up correctly. Oy vey.
I had no idea what to do. I tried calling Miles but he was sleeping, which is what I figured. We pulled into the Days Inn parking lot and he gave me his number and said that his name was Dana.
Argh. Now he's pretty much dodging us. I should have called the cops, but I was just upset and had never been in a wreck before...and what can I say, I trust people.
He doesn't want to involve insurance because he doesn't want his premium to go up. The thing is that we are totally cool with not bringing insurance into it, if he's willing to pay the repair cost. When Miles called him he said that he didn't cause the tail light to be broken, and was very shady with his license plate number.
I came home after the whole ordeal and just started bawling. I woke Miles up and he started making calls. I like him.
The worst part about it is that I shouldn't have moved the car and I should have called the police.

In other news, I still don't feel great. I took my temp a few minutes ago and it was 100.3. I'm currently freezing and my back and neck hurt. I laid down from about 5:30 to 10. I didn't sleep well. I had the heating pad on for my back then I woke up sweating, so I turned it off and threw it on the floor. The rest of the time I was laying down I felt like I still had the heating pad on.
I made some soup, and ate very little of it. Miles ran to the store and picked me up some popsicles and Sprite. Again, I like him.

I don't have to work tomorrow, luckily, but I am taking some senior pictures. Let's hope I feel better so I can get those out of the way. I have a ton of pictures coming up! Saturday was McKenzie, tomorrow is Danielle, Saturday is some family pictures and Paige, sometime in the near future is a girl named Sarah, then the 7th is Zoe.

Now I think I'll go watch part of a movie with Miles while he eats some food before he goes to work.

I hope this all gets better!

Friday, October 23, 2009

Let me see...

I'm almost done with Jay's pictures!

There's lots of them.

I'm closing at work tonight. It should be okay, closing is the least miserable. Miles is getting his hair cut tonight at 5, so he has to take me to work and pick me up. Afterward we're going to do a little shopping.
Tomorrow I am taking McKenzie's pictures. I don't know what time though...I should find that out today. I'm trying to get Aimee to come along for some help directing and making conversation run more smoothly, but I don't think she wants to.
Then tomorrow evening there's an Office gathering at Mandy's! (Do you like how I say it's at Mandy's like other people read this?!) I'm excited! Tonight I am going to make some foil and paper clip medals.

Yesterday I had the day off, which was nice. I edited some pictures, went to Hobby Lobby, Big Lots, and Wal Mart, edited some more pictures, then watched Collin from 6 to 7:30. That boy just thinks he's in charge.

I guess for now I should work on these pictures. I need to get as many done today as possible.
I'll be getting more Saturday, and more Wednesday, and more next Saturday (possibly x2), then the Saturday after! Yay for being overwhelmed!

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

I should be sleeping.

Yes, I really should be sleeping right now. I'm going to wake up at 7:45 in the morning. That will give me time to get ready for the day, finish some paper work, and maybe watch the new NCIS episode (YAY!) before going to Kansas City. Eek.

There are three main parts to tomorrow.

1. Appointment with the lady doctor.
2. Lunch and a trip to Gordman's with my momma, Mandy and Miles' momma.
3. Bible study

Miles invited a few people to Bible study tomorrow.
Matt K said he can't unless it's a super late Bible study.
Ally says she has midterms.
(Matt and Ally are both out of town.)
Bobby says he has class til 6 but might be able to come over after that.
Zach says he already has plans.

I just don't think people want to go to Bible study.

In other news, I've been super emotional the last couple of days. I attribute it to stress, mainly. I've been working on these senior pictures for what seems like forever now. I did get Leeanne's done. It shouldn't take too much horribly longer to get Jessie's done. And, I've only edited 3 of Jay's pictures. Starting with Jay I am going to go through the pictures and write down 100 of them that I will edit extensively. I figure that even if I don't tell him that he probably won't notice. I mean, I won't delete the rest, but only 100 will be vintagey, or black and white, or sepia, etc. That will reduce my work load tremendously.
I've been working about 5 days a week at Kmart, then coming home, editing pictures, and cooking dinner. Then I've been going out and taking senior pictures. It's been busy.

I was supposed to take Paige's senior pictures this coming Saturday. As of yesterday I won't be doing that anymore. DeKalb's softball team won districts so they'll be playing this Saturday. She wants to reschedule for the 31st, but I don't know if that'll work for me. Wanda put a note on the schedule saying that not everyone that asks for it off will get it I figure we'll see when the time comes. If I am working on Halloween then we're going to try to do her pictures on the 14th of November. The reason this is important is that now I have a completely free Saturday! I asked to have it off work since I was going to be doing the pictures, and now I'm not...awesome. I will be happy.

But I guess now I should sleep. I am getting tired, luckily. And, I open Thursday at Kmart, so it'll help me to be a little tired tomorrow night.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

I just don't like football, okay?

Miles and I have come to my parents' house to watch the Missouri - Nebraska game. I just don't like watching football. It's confusing and boring and long and it makes Miles yell, jump, and run around the room. It's far too emotional.
My parents actually aren't here at the moment. They've gone to Uncle D's to eat dinner, but they're supposed to head back here after they're done. I've decided to make the night productive and do some laundry. I was thinking about working on my website, but then I realized that I just didn't want to.

I've been working too often, I think. I work Monday 7:45-3, Tuesday 7:45-3, Wednesday 7:45-12, today 12-4 and I work tomorrow 7:45-12. Tomorrow shouldn't be too bad, really, but I just don't want to wake up early again. Then next week I am working 7:45-2 Monday and Thursday, then I think I'm closing on Friday 3-10:15...and I'm working Tuesday but I don't remember what the hours are. Either way I have Wednesday off for my dreaded doctor's appointment (ugh).

Saturday I am taking Jay's senior pictures. It should be a good time and I'm really hoping that it's not horribly cold, cloudy or windy. I am stoked to get to actually use my new lens, though. I got it on Tuesday and I haven't really had a chance to use it. It'll make me happy. I think Miles is coming along for those pictures, so that should be alright.

In other, more excited, news: I had Taco Bell for dinner tonight and it was delicious. I had a double decker without lettuce and a crunchy taco without lettuce. Nummy.

I've been thinking about other things I could do with my photography stuff. I'm not really sure about the whole thing.
This is my new idea:
Senior-esque pictures but with non-seniors. Basically, just charge like $75 to go out for a couple of hours and take pictures of people (probably girls, because guys aren't huge models). Just have fun with it and they get to basically just be like models.
I think it'd be fun, but then again I also think that every girl that I take pictures of needs to want to wear a dress...and they don't seem to agree. Maybe I'll try to do something of the sort in the future, but probably not.
But, I was talking to Justin the other day about my new lens and pictures I've been taking. I told him how I just need a girl to wear a dress because it's so much prettier and it would be more fun for me to take and edit the pictures. Basically, a girl standing by a wall in jeans and t-shirt is just a girl standing by a wall, but a girl standing by a wall in a flowy (that's not really a word...what?) dress is so much more interesting and pretty! Anyway, Justin said that I should tell everyone that they can wear whatever they want and however many things they want, but tell them they should bring something semi-formal. I like it!
I'll suggest it to my next couple of girls.

Maybe I'll find some other way to occupy my time here. Too bad I can't edit pictures while I'm here...that's really what I should be doing. Oy vey.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Thursday, October 1, 2009

1:59 am

I feel pretty blah right now. I was scheduled to work 2-6 today, which sucks in some regards, but is awesome in others. Let's skip to the 'why it's awesome' aspects: 1) I don't have to wake up early 2) It's only 4 hours 3) There are usually 2 cashiers for most of the shift 4) I don't have to be there until 10:15! Jay ended up calling in early today (yesterday) so MaryAnn called and asked if I could come in at 4 and stay until close instead. I said that I could, of course. Working nights generally makes me feel not awesome because I come home hungry and not wanting to prepare anything. Like tonight I had planned on making tacos for dinner. When I got home I was too hungry wait to actually make anything, and it was too late, and Miles was sleeping, so I just ate some ramen noodles, cocoa pebbles and some bbq chips. Thinking of all of those things together is gross.


Anyway, I'm pretty stoked for Saturday. I'm taking LeeAnne's pictures. She wants a country theme which should be okay. I am ready for someone who doesn't want a country theme. I am ready for someone who wants some really, really super fun photos and won't think my ideas are stupid/crazy. Which brings me to Jessie! Jessie is Kristi's friend who goes to Lafayette. We're going to try to do her pictures on Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday of next week. I'm even more stoked for those because I think my ideas will fly better with her than anyone else. Then next Saturday is going to be Jay time. That'll be fun. Jay is so full of ideas and is so excited.

I really want to not work at Kmart anymore. I still enjoy the people I work with, for the most part, and I really don't mind actually working, but I'm just getting tired of it. I don't like not being able to cook dinner and having to put up with ridiculous customers. I really hate answering the phone while I'm trying to check someone out. And I hate getting scolded by Maggie and/or Eric for not chasing people out of the store (yo, bro, I'm not chasing people outside...last time I checked that was not my job). I also hate when Maggie comes in at night to shop and starts rattling off commands to me.

I just want to take pictures, edit those pictures, take more pictures, edit those pictures, and maybe design the occasional wedding invitation. I want to be able to decide when my hours are. I'd love to be able to hang around home on most week days just working on pictures and go take pictures on Saturdays. That'd be lovely. But, I guess if it's supposed to happen that way, it will. So, I'll wait and see how it goes down.

I just don't want to be at Kmart between November 1st and January 15th. No thank you, Ma'am.